People are always asking me how I do it. I have a family of four, a full-time job, two businesses of my own, I've written a book and I maintain a steady social media presence on multiple platforms. When I tell people about all this, they stare at me wide eyed and ask me how I could possibly make it all happen.
I usually don't know how to answer them. I sometimes shrug and say, "Oh, I don't know," because aren't women expected to simply make everything happen and make it look effortless? I can't let anyone know that sometimes I struggle, or that I ask for help from time to time. Sometimes I tell them that I'm neurotically organized and blame it on my relentless inability to turn off, but that makes it seem like I'm some superhuman automaton, and that's not correct. The truth is, I'm just another Millennial who loves to be multidimensional.
I recently read about how the members of my generation are building portfolio careers, and I believe that to be accurate. I have a day job, and I like it, but I don't want that to be the only thing I do. I have so much more I want to accomplish. I also don't just want to be defined by being a wife and mother. I love being those things, but I contribute so much outside of that paradigm. I have many dimensions, and I want to express them all.
If you're like me, then I think this blog will be for you. I've been writing about business, HR and current events that effect both, and I would like to continue to do so, but I'd also like to add in an element discussing how we can shape our lives and careers to achieve everything we want. I will talk openly about how I balance all the things I do. I want to celebrate treating myself well, because it's an important part of being ready to give one hundred percent to my family and job. I want to change the conversation about working, living and enjoying, and I'll start by being a little vulnerable. I'll share my journey, and I hope you'll share yours with me, as well.
In that spirit, I'll start with a story about finding my balance. I admit that when I get really interested in a topic, whether it's about business or Korean pop music (ask me about it sometime!), I can completely lose myself in it. It can be a gift, and it's how I can churn out some of my best work, but it can be an absolute curse. I can neglect other things in my life, and that's exactly what I found myself doing one night. I'd gotten a great idea, and I couldn't wait to execute on it, but in a portfolio career and life, each aspect of your day has to wait its turn. When it came time to work on this idea, which happened to be a chapter of my book, all I wanted once my daughter was asleep was to sit down at my laptop and write. My husband, though, was expecting to spend time together. We both worked a lot and when the evening came around it was time to unwind, talk about our days and organize our lives together. Well, we weren't syncing up on this one, and...well, you know what happens when spouses don't agree!
Once we got those initial angry reactions out ("What do you mean you don't want to spend time with me!" "It's not about you!"), I decided to just be honest. I had this idea that I just had to get out there. Surely he must have felt that way before. And in fact, he did, and that's why he was so annoyed. He was in the process of ignoring his own big idea to spend time with me, and was insulted that I was blowing him off! We decided to have a co-working party. We put on cartoons, poured some drinks, and got to work on our respective projects, promising that the next night would be reserved for each other. We both ended up happy, and we agreed that scheduling time for each other was just as important as scheduling work. Lesson learned.
Please feel free to give me your comments, suggestions and thoughts, and be sure to subscribe! I hope you'll want to see and be a part of where this conversation goes. I think we'll go quite far together.